Listening to the Silence: 3 Ways to Restructure Your Prayer Life

John 7:38, "Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them."

Revelation 7:17, "For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; 'He will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.'"

________

I had spent the night before late in the theatre preparing for Pride&Prejudice and somehow found the strength to roll out of bed to Friday Morning Worship at 6:30am.

I don't have classes on Fridays so I was using my day as a retreat of sorts.

I stayed at the house of a family friend, frolicked with their big dogs, helped clean their horses and barn, napped, and prayed. Pretty solid retreat.

Except for the prayer part.

I specifically wanted to pray about my future that day.

The usual: should I go to grad school, who should I marry, should I join Cru staff, what should my summer look like...

And you know that feeling where God's just not giving you anything...?

Yup.

My thoughts were foggy, I couldn't discern His voice...I just couldn't hear Him.

So I did my best not to be angry or discouraged and I chased after a goat that had just gotten loose (gotta find the humor in life people).

Later in the day a friend and I walked to coffee and she said, "I've been frustrated with God this week. I think I'm called to seminary and I want to go, but I just haven't heard confirmation about it. Maybe God just wants me to focus more on the now right now."

Same.

How I responded surprised even me, "Well, ya, keep in mind you're a freshman and seminary wouldn't happen for several years. Even if you got confirmation now what would you do with it?"

I thought to myself, "Ya Taylor, if the guy you were meant to marry walked down the street right now and proposed what would you even do with that? You're not meant to know right now."

I took God's silence towards me and my friend about our well intentioned "planning prayers" as a different kind of revelation than we expected.

A different kind of response from God.

~A silence that redirected the content and purpose of our prayers~

Lesson 1: We'll know what we need to know when we need to know it. God's silence isn't a discouragement from prayer, but rather a motivator to listen to hear what else He might be calling us to consider.

It was clear that I wasn't going to know about grad school, my future husband, or joining Cru staff that day. I didn't need to.

And that was my answer: "Taylor, be ok with not knowing for now and listen to what I'm whispering to Your heart now."

So, I changed my prayers and my questions to discern what God has for me in the present; In this current season of my life. And I've (actually) begun trusting Him with my future and even the timing of when I'll pray about it.

This revelation about prayer has also changed what I expect to hear from God.

While praying about if I should join Cru staff, I expected to hear a clear "yes" or "no."

But again, I'm not prepared to handle that information. I really have no idea what being on staff would be like and I still have two years before I graduate for God to mold my passions and skills...

He could completely change the direction of my life if He wanted to. And I need to be open to that happening.

Colossians 4:2 speaks to this prayer tactic, "Continue earnestly in prayer, being vigilant in it with thanksgiving..."

That word vigilant signals to me that we need to be open, aware, and watchful about how the Lord is answering our prayers. The answers may not come to be what we expect, so we must be vigilant.

Ephesians 6:18 gives us a similar admonision, "...praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for the saints..."

There's that watchful word again. But watchful to which "end"? I'd say the end of being supplicant to the Spirit; Being submissive to His movement and tenacious in His call for us.

Again my prayers changed from, "give me the plan," to "God, create in me the kind of heart that wants to follow Your plan and reveal to me the steps I need to take day by day."

Hear the difference?

Honestly, the deepest difference isn't in the words I pray or even the content (though that did change). The difference is found in why I'm praying in the first place.

Lesson 2: Life is way better when we actually want to get to know God.

I don't mean to get into that guilt-trippy sermon about identifying motives and squishing and mushing them until they are what they are meant to be.

I just want to say that when we talk with people, the best conversations are when we just talk because we want to be with that person, not because we only want some info from them.

I've spent too much of my prayer time begging God to give me clarity while completely forgetting that He desires intimacy with me and not even knowing how to listen for clarity because I'm so desperate to know the answer.

God wants to inform me about my identity in Him and the truth of His steadfast promises and loving person.

Before He gives me clarity about my circumstance, He wants to remind me who I am and of His great love for me.

He wants me to want and to trust Him over knowing my path or anything else.

And I find that as I fall deeper in love with Christ, it doesn't really matter what happens in my life.

When my awareness of Christ's love for me grows, my prayers much more easily take on the tone of,

"God I just want to hear Your voice because I love the sound of it. Send me wherever, but that's less important to me than going there with You."

Lesson 3: Once we've learned that God isn't weak and quiet--that He speaks and it is really us who need to learn to listen--the truth of His abundance and playfulness brings the greatest adventure.

I just want to know what Christ thinks about my desires, what joy He has in store for me, and how I can know His love better amidst any circumstance.

Jesus loves to teach us how to pray, friends. He did it when He was on earth with the Our Father and He Himself prayed for us while He was here.

He wants intimacy with us and knows prayer is a huge component of that. He would never drive us away from Himself through silence. Instead of being bitter about silence, why don't we learn how to listen to it?

In light of His desire to gain intimacy with us, to overflow us with blessings, to bring us joy, and to reveal more of His beauty to us, how could we view His silence as a refusal to communicate?

For me, because I know my Savior and trust His love for me, I must believe His silence is a loving redirection; a powerful guide.

I cannot hear silence and feel teased and ignored when I reflect on His love and desires for me.

I cannot help but pray that the Spirit would change my desires to match His when I soak in His promises of faithfulness and plans of goodness for me.

I cannot cling to getting answers my way in my time when I remember the adventure offered by simply walking the road with God.

I cannot care about the answers, the adventure, or the outcome when I trust in His sovereignty.

I'd miss the joy of resting in Him and searching for His playfulness each day, and I've decided I'm not about that life.

I'm about the life that believes in God's constant communication with me and His patience in teaching me how to receive His voice and His love.

"God is not an employer looking for employess.

He is an Eagle looking for people who will take refuge under His wings.

He is looking for people who will leave father and mother and homeland

or anything else that may hold them back from

a life of love under the wings of Jesus." - John Piper